The rift between the brothers came about only when Harry married a woman who made him fantasize about his friends and family. She brought out the worst in him and I will always see Harry’s wife as a narcissistic psychopath; she is inherently cruel. Harry was raised with the idea that he had the same status as Prince William. That was an unfortunate mistake because Harry was only a spare in his childhood. He will not be king, but he is expected to support the king, whether that be his father or his brother.

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What started as simple jealousy bloomed into hatred fed by the lies of Harry’s current wife Meghan Markle. Harry was equal to any other person when it came to their humanity, but in a monarchy there are rankings and one must deal with it and get on with life. Both Princess Anne and Prince Edward are exemplary in supporting their elder brother, King Charles. This is how a monarchy works.
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When it comes to Harry, however, the rift began not because of favoritism at all. Harry enjoyed a close and loving relationship with Queen Elizabeth and Prince William. Diana fawned over Harry, even as his behavior drove her to irritation. She wanted Harry to feel just as valuable as William, so there was no favoritism from Charles or Diana. The Queen Mother was fond of William, and Harry noticed his brother received preferential treatment when it came to learning how to be a king. The Queen had William over for tea to talk about it. Harry noticed these things.

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There was no rift until 2017, the year Harry married a woman he didn’t know well, and a woman intent on not fitting into the family hierarchy. While the wife looked at William with hunger, Harry joined in on ganging up against Catherine (who is one of the nicest people). Harry and Meghan wanted to be the next Prince and Princess of Wales, and they tried to pollute the world’s opinion of Prince William and Catherine. This had nothing to do with birth order favoritism. It was a desire for the top spot.
I could go on and on listing all the reasons for the rift, but to answer this question, it has nothing to do with birth order or favoritism. Even William made sure Harry was involved in his life. He tried to keep Harry from binge drinking. Catherine, the Princess of Wales, thought of Harry as a younger brother. Harry was loved, but he turned on William and Catherine and even went so far as to make disparaging remarks about Wales’ children.
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The rift exists now to protect Prince William’s family from the grenades of lies and hate emanating from Harry and his poor choice of a wife. Harry and their wife asked William to share the Prince of Wales title with them. Harry asked for half of the Duchy of Cornwall’s profits (of which only the Duke of Cornwall receives and manages). Harry wanted to share the kingdom. The top job. And Harry deliberately and cruelly hurt Queen Elizabeth, too. He and his wife lied about so much, and they were mean to the late Queen.
The rift exists only due to the behavior of Harry. He hurt Prince Philip as he was dying, and Harry had been a favorite of Philip’s! Harry hurt Queen Elizabeth while she was dying, and Harry had been a favorite of Queen Elizabeth’s. The royals have had enough of Harry’s lies and hatred. This rift between William and Harry will likely last for the rest of their lives. And it came out from a poor marital choice on the part of Harry.
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